It's shouldn't be about them. If it is, you need to evaluate why your wanting to improve.
Don’t wait for the world or other people to give you validation as you reach for your goals. Sure, it’s possible you’ll get kudos and pats on the back for your accomplishments, and It will feel good.
Part of being whole is knowing that you will be the primary beneficiary of your efforts. You deserve everything that comes with it – a balanced outlook on life, the ability to limit ‘nice’ behaviors that erode your personal power, a better body, more money – whatever the results of your efforts may be. At the end of the day, it’s all about YOU.
No one else. You. YOU deserve the efforts of your improvement.
This may sound selfish, but it’s really is the best way to motivate yourself to grow as a person – through putting in the work because YOU deserve it. To be a better friend, relative, son, daughter, spouse, parent, etc. to the people who matter most in life. It can be thankless endeavors, if we see it through the lens of others and how they view them and base your efforts on their impressions. It’s not about them at all.
When you do it all for you, it will make all of the difference in the world.
In “Become Whole”, I discuss how people can react negatively to changes in others at first. People seek consistency in their lives. Your changes will disrupt their sense of consistency. Does this mean you should never change to accommodate them?? Absolutely not! Reaching your highest potential should take precedence over any short-term feelings they have about what you’re doing.
On the other hand, perhaps they won’t react at all. You’re changing, but they never give you appreciation or acknowledge it. Other possibility is that their first reaction might not be one of encouragement, but disapproval instead, as discussed above. A major problem is that it places expectations on other people. Your efforts towards your growth become conditional on the actions or words of someone else, which is largely beyond your control.
When you put in the hard work for you, and you alone, you’ll naturally develop a higher sense of self-worth and a confidence that is the hallmark of being whole. Steering your ship in life regardless of the words and actions of other people is the ultimate source of power over your direction in life. People have this tendency to believe they know better than you do, and so they give their opinions on what you “should be doing” instead of what is in your heart and soul. While they may mean well, your own personal power is precious, and it’s should be carefully guarded at all times.
Always make yourself the prime reason for improvement. People will react as they will, but your personal power is yours, and yours alone.