Our masks serve a purpose for us. There are times when we should wear them, and other times when we need to put them away.
….No, I’m not talking about the medical masks that we need during this pandemic.
Rather, this is about the masks we put up in our day-to-day lives as we relate to other people and the world.
We all wear masks to certain extents in life. It’s crucial for our survival as a species to present ourselves in ways that suit our needs. This is an extremely healthy thing to do.
The problem comes when we put on masks to for manipulative means, such as gaining something at the expense of someone else. This is where we run into problems.
That being said, it’s not wrong to “put on a mask” for something such as a job interview, asking for a raise or promotion, or wanting to impress a potential romantic partner on a date. All are perfectly acceptable ways in which we “wear a mask”.
The problems come when wearing them is purely for personal gain. Also, and perhaps even more destructive, is when we deceive ourselves into thinking and believing that the mask is necessary to cover up who we are. This comes about because of a belief that we not accepting able being who we really are, or worse, believing that who we are isn’t acceptable to others. This is rooting in a fundamental lack of self-worth and goes to the core of a person.
Don't let shame and false beliefs keep a mask locked to your face. It's okay to be you.
Many “nice” behaviors that I cover in my book are also from this same faulty viewpoint – Our authentic selves are bad, and we have to wear masks to cover up the “horrible person” within. Shame is the root of this particular dilemma. For a person to really express their true selves, they must know it’s safe to do so.
When someone believes that being authentic will open themselves up to ridicule, the masks are seen as necessary. The way to be authentic to other people is to truly accept and love ourselves first. It’s sounds cliché, but it’s completely true.
When you love yourself first, you can be in a position to question why you’d feel shame in who you are. Why would someone else not accept parts of you? When you start questioning those shameful beliefs, you can start to break down barriers that can unlock your vast potential in life.
When you actively question the beliefs that hold you back about yourself, you can open doors that you’ve only dreamed of. You unlock your full potential.
Don’t let a mask that’s locked onto your face hold you back from being who you are. You are worthy. You are enough.
When negative beliefs about ourselves change, we can detach the mask(s) that we cling to.
You can take off the mask. It’s okay. It’ll be hard at first. Take baby steps if you need to. But it can be done. Small steps are still steps and are no less important for your growth.
It’s okay to be who you are. When you can confidently be yourself and stand up when it appropriate, set proper boundaries, and know your worth, you’re on your way to becoming “whole” in the sense that you know your worth. This leads to greater satisfaction in every aspect of your life.
Look up resources that can help you with this. There are many resources you can turn to that can help greatly, but only if you place into action what they recommend. My book, “Become Whole” is a great place to start; another great resource is the classic book “As A Man Thinkth” by James Allen (Will post a book review soon).
When you have a greater sense of control over your mind and the script you tell yourself, you can do the work to change your outlook for the better.